Greetings to you and I hope you are well. You may not know me but as a celebrity, it is part of your job that I know you. The question is “Are you known for the right or wrong reasons?”
The reason I am writing this letter to you is to pretty much contribute my own ingredient in your journey or what might be called “THE BECOMING OF TOKE MAKINWA”.
Firstly, I must say that you have recently risen to the limelight and it is a pity that all the baggage that accompanies the limelight is obviously a part of your rise. It’s funny how we Nigerians fail to live in cognizance to the society which we live in. And this society as we all know it prohibits certain kind of behavior especially from females.
Take a look back at America when she was 54 years old. Do you really think women had this much power then? What I am trying to say is that the country and society we are in is not ready for that much “Westernization” even though we like to believe we are.
Do you think this may be the cause of your current predicament? If I am to have my say, which I obviously am then the answer is YES!
I would hate to think that you were actually completely oblivious that this would happen. Let’s be honest, even a blind man would have seen from miles away that you were digging a VERY deep hole with your choice of boyfriend, fiancé, husband and now probably soon to be EX-HUSBAND.
Let me break it down for those out there who might not know what’s going on.
As a boyfriend, Maje Ayida was short of appropriate. Not only did he treat you badly, he was also dating you alongside Anita (who recently had his baby). How else can you explain the fact that he dated you for 12 years and dated Anita for 8 years, yet he is less than 40? Or did he start dating Anita at the age of four? Once again, the question is “Were you aware of Anita the side-chick but didn’t mind since you were supposedly the main chick?”
As a fiancé, not only were his family totally not in support of your union, he went ahead and STOOD YOU UP while you were waiting with friends and family in court so eagerly to marry him. Could this be because he felt he was making a mistake and would rather be with his ex girlfriend, Anita? At this point, the signs were glaring but for reasons best known to you, you chose to ignore them. Few weeks later, you went ahead and married this same man in secret. You must think you are Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City. But guess what Toke, Carrie was almost 40years old in the movie. She didn’t have a choice but to go ahead and marry Big even after he didn’t show up for their wedding. You on the other hand were not yet 30 at the occurrence of this incident. You should have known better!
As a husband, even after you must have felt you’ve been victorious by finally bearing the coveted title of “Mrs. Maje Ayida”, he goes ahead and puts a cherry on the cake by impregnating the same girl whom he dated while dating you and was probably the reason he stood you up in court and NOW, she has had his baby? How surprising is that? Only not so much!
Toke Toke Toke, how could you let this happen? Were you too busy pursuing your career that you ignored all the vivid signs saying this guy is such bad news? Now you’re considering becoming a divorcee after just a year of marriage so you could focus on your career. All because you didn’t open your eyes and see him for whom he is. Why didn’t you just leave him then while he was double dating or when he stood you up? Weren’t those things bad enough? Didn’t he hurt you enough? Yet you went ahead and married him.
I really do hope women learn from your experience that men don’t change simply because they put a ring on it. If he’s bad before marriage, he would be bad after marriage. As a matter of fact, he most likely would top up his game and become worse.
It took you 13 years and a step child to come to your senses. If you do stay married to him then be ready to carry your cross because I doubt he has iced the cake; he probably has got more terrible boyfriend/fiancé/husband acts up his sleeve.
I wish you all the best Toke, I really do. But you made your bed; you chose to marry him despite everything, now you have to lie on it. The choices we make in life always make or break us. Choose wisely people. You only get one shot!
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